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Free Time? What’s That?

I have a confession.  I always get a slight tinge of jealousy on Friday’s when my non-kid friends or colleagues are so excited for the weekend, presumably because they have ‘free’ time to do as they please. I, on the other hand, have forgotten what ‘free’ time means.

I listen to them speak about their upcoming trips to tropical destinations, and can feel my mouth dropping as I imagine myself on a beach with a Corona.  Those thoughts then turn into hallucinations before someone snaps me back into reality, “Holly, are you listening?”  Um no, I was living through you and you ruined it d-bag!

 Don’t get me wrong, my nights and weekends are filled with family time and I enjoy every minute.  However, I do (sometimes) miss the days of sleeping in, OR just sleeping at all.

 As parents we know our ‘real’ job doesn’t begin until we come home.  Our free time goes something like this:  Drive home, unload kids, cook them dinner, cook you dinner (because they NEVER want to eat what you eat), bath time, brush teeth, story time, bed time, your shower time, then is it already 10 pm? Your bedtime. Ex-haus-ting!  Oh and if your kid is sick, then you are really screwed because you will probably be up all night cleaning up throw up and a** explosions. You are sure to enjoy that next day at work!

Of course when you have a night like this, the next day is when non-kid friends have to tell you how they are so tired, and so busy and expect sympathy from you.  I wish I could blurt out,  “Shut your face!  Wait until you have kids, then tell me how tired and busy you are.”  I refrain because I remember when I was a non-kid person, and that always would annoy me.

In the end, I have to admit listening to non-kid people whine about their ‘busy’ lives makes me feel like a bad a**. Because not only am I the HBIC at work, but I do this after pulling all-nighters cleaning up vomit and poop.  Take that losers.

I find this picture hilarious. Enjoy.
I find this picture hilarious. Enjoy.
Holly
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Holly Rust is a native Texan currently living in the great city of Chicago with her husband and two sons. Aside from chasing around two lunatic boys all day, she is a writer, author, and runs a global skin care business. Her blog was featured on The TODAY Show’s List of Funniest Parents on Facebook. You can find her work on HuffPo, Good Housekeeping, Town & Country, Scary Mommy, Dot Complicated, TODAY and many more. You can also find her essays published in several anthologies. Follow her random thoughts on Facebook and Instagram – but no judging.

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